In my previous post, I’ve given you the signs to confirm if you have been ghosted or not. Now, I’ll be giving you some tips on how to cope up with this really bad experience.
Honestly, I have experienced this as well. When I was ghosted, I already knew because he became unusual. This guy wasn’t as funny, thoughtful and sweet like the first couple of days we’ve been talking.
I admit it was hard. I didn’t exactly know how to react or what to feel afterwards, without having anybody else to talk about it. And I don’t want anyone to experience the same process that’s why I want to reach out to you and tell you that you can get over this through these tips.
- Accept the reality.
Yes, you’ve been ghosted. You need to accept that fact, but that shouldn’t be followed by starting to question your value or maybe trying to blame yourself for what happened.
Listen to me, you are not the problem, it’s him/her. It’s the other party who doesn’t have the balls to tell you directly that he/she do not wish to continue seeing you. Maybe they just got bored, or maybe they’re not yet ready to enter in a relationship. Or perhaps they haven’t moved on from a past relationship yet.
We got no control over it, let’s face it.
- Pour out your emotion.
If you feel like crying or shouting, feel free to do so. After all, you have the right to feel that way and let it all out. Being ghosted is something painful, and we’re humans. We are actually supposed to feel all sorts of emotions. When I was going through with this, I was sort of devastated. I lost appetite for days, felt really tired, slept often and became really sappy.
We won’t judge you, promise.
- Don’t try to ask for explanation.
Just don’t. If you do, it will be more painful for you because they might point out the reasons harshly or worse, you’ll just be ignored. If they really want to give you an explanation, they would do that in the first place. No need to beg for it.
- Stop communicating with him/her.
If you’re thinking of reaching out to them just to know what they’re up to, then you shouldn’t do it. It will just make you feel awful when this person didn’t reply. No ghoster wants to be friends with the ghostee.
Stop waiting for his text or call, because honey, they won’t. Especially if it has been three freaking days already!
- Stop visiting their social media account.
Please, for the love of God, don’t do that anymore. It will only be more painful for you if you see how great they are while you’re suffering on your own. Plus, you’re making it hard for you to detach yourself from that person.
Why not just log out of all your accounts to avoid seeing updates about that person? It’ll be easier, but the feeling with kill you a bit.
- Don’t visit the memory lane.
Remember that café you used to visit together? Or that song that you used to listen in your car? How about those sweet messages he/she sent you? Avoid all of them, dearie.
As long as you’re keeping that person in your mind, you will not get over with it.
- Be productive.
Try to do things that will clear your mind and will help you avoid thinking of this person.
If you’re meaning to watch this new television series, go download it already. If you’ve been dreaming of reading the newest book releases, run to your nearest bookstore! If you want to learn new things or play an instrument, now’s the perfect time for that!
Doing a general cleaning in your house could be an option, but for some, it will only give you more time to think about that coward.
- Cheer yourself up.
Being ghosted is not an easy thing, but you should know that this could be a blessing in disguise. Who knows? This person could be a drug addict, or maybe a total a-hole.
Pat yourself. You’ve just dodged a bullet.
- Reflect about yourself.
List all the good traits you see in yourself. Kindness, sense of humor, or whatever. Make yourself see that the coward who ghosted you doesn’t deserve all the good things about you. It is their loss, not ours.
So, yeah! These are just nine steps, but I promise you these are helpful. I’ve done all of this and I’m actually feeling better. Well, not totally but atleast there’s an improvement, right?
One day, we’ll find someone who will treasure us and make us feel worthy of everything. Just be patient and wait for the right person to come along.
From the girl who was never too brave,